June is Pride month, where around the country events take place to honor the LGBT community. It is an opportunity to celebrate their dignity and equality while bringing awareness to issues that they face daily.
How does “The Church” or Faith community measure up in how we love our LGBT friend?
Five years ago I had the honor of supporting one of my closest friends as the best man when she married her wife. There was a ton of support from Christians I spoke with but it also prompted plenty of pushback. I prayed and wrestled with this choice earnestly and in the end I have peace that love and Jesus won that day.
I am not writing this blog to defend my choice or to rewrite theology. I have been taking a course put together by The Center for Faith Sexuality and Gender and I feel very encouraged by the approach of Pastor Preston Sprinkle, I promise that is his real name. He says that as a church leader it is more important for me to know and lover real LGBT people and pour into their lives, than it is for me to know every verse in the Bible that mentions same sex relationships. Amen brother.
Do you know how many LGBT people had a connection to the church at some point in their lives? Can you guess how many of them have stories of being hurt, mistreated or outright abandoned by that same church? That’s rhetorical … my favorite viewpoint that Pastor Sprinkle offers is that it is not “the churches theology that needs to change, it’s their posture.”
I believe that we can walk hand in hand with people as they experience life, which includes sexual orientation. The church should be a safe and compassionate place for the LGBT community, not one of torment.
See even though my BFF lights the menorah it’s not our theology that has hurt her, but words from actual Christians that have made her feel like the church doesn’t want her there. I argue that not only do we want her, we need her there. She has loved me when I was most unlovable, and forgiven me at my most unforgivable. Called me out when I was wrong and humbled me in life’s greatest victories. She is a caring, compassionate friend and doting Aunt to my girls. She has shown me the kind of love the Bible says we should show each other.

I challenge fellow Christ followers to pray earnestly to have a heart that honors God and loves people, just like Jesus did.
Love you Bone!
The Deacon Speaks

We all feel some guilt in our lives at one point or another. Maybe it’s because you haven’t been to the gym in a while, or because you had two pieces of pie instead of one, or maybe you’re a mom like me an you suffer from “mom guilt.” Mom guilt is BRUTAL! If you are a working mom like me, I’m sure you are always wondering if you’re doing enough for your kids, if you’re giving enough at work, or to your spouse. It is a constant struggle and not easy to find balance.
This afternoon my youngest came home from school and asked my why I wasn’t at her play today. I stared blankly into her big brown eyes and silently wondered, “what play?” Suddenly images of the flyer on the fridge that read “Kinder Play – 2 pm” flashed into my brain. OMG. I missed it. How could I possibly forget? I am the worst mom on the face of the earth. I was immediately consumed by guilt and convinced myself she would be scarred for life. I quickly said “oh honey, I am so sorry I missed it. I had a meeting and I could not make it.” LIES, total LIES. Truth is, I didn’t have the courage to tell her I forgot. What would she think of me??
But, we often underestimate our kids. My sweet 5 year old little girl looked up at me and said “it’s ok mommy, you were at the other 2 plays and I know you love me, I forgive you”
She hugged me and skipped out singing Old Town Road…I stood there speechless.
Forgive me? How can she forgive me? I can barely forgive myself. The fact is, she already knew everything I needed her to know. she knew hos much I loved her, and without and without her even asking she forgave me. She showed me the grace that I could not show myself. Maybe instead of beating myself up, I could learn something from her. Even as a Christian who knows God’s grace, it’s often easier said than done.

We all try to be the best parents we can be, but we will undoubtedly fail at times. Instead of carrying around the guilt, let’s remind ourselves it is OK to fail, especially when we learn from it. I’m learning to give myself a break once in a while and I hope you can too.

Let’s go have a second piece of pie.

Mrs. Deacon

Do you remember when Seinfeld was talking about working out? He was like, “What’s the point? You workout so you can get to the next workout.” I have never had a job that required me to run miles at a time, do burpees, contort my body into a wheel or ride a stationary bike while dancing. Yet, I find myself working out 3-4 times per week. The Deacon is genetically predisposed to not be what you would call “ripped.” In fact, I refer to myself as “fat fit.” I am on a journey to lose a few pounds, look less like the Michelin man on the beach and be able to wear skinny jeans. Well maybe not that …But I also want to be around for my kids and show them that fitness is not just about your reflection in the mirror, it’s that space between your ears. Mine has more space than most, but when I feel good physically, I certainly respond better emotionally. And when I am emotionally healthy, I am more present and engaged with the people in my life. It is a personal journey and I hope you find perspective and give yourself a break. The Bible says your body is a temple and you have to train it. I agree. I may never have a 6 pack, but I can still bench press a keg …so I guess I am living my best life. Cheers to your health…inside and out.
The Deacon Speaks

I realized today that I am a middle aged. While at the playground with my daughter. I got on the swings. And started swinging. I could feel nausea rise and my bowels spinning. This could cure any constipation. I could feel my Eustachian tubes vibrating with each swing. Not a pleasant sensation for a 40 year old man. Then I got stuck in the slide due to my size. Yes I am middle aged. And I have embraced it. No more swings for me. Except for my patients mood swings. They are safer.
The Doc is In

I do not know about many things. But I do know medicine. My 3 year old daughter does not necessarily agree. She has a limited scope of medical knowledge at this time. She knows where her belly is located and that she need nail polish on her toes and earrings in her ears. That is the extent of her anatomy. The only other things she knows that if she gets a boo-boo it should be covered with a Band-Aid. How to apply band-aids is not something that is a focus in either medical school or residency. Thankfully nurses and medical assistants have had this skill. I realize today I do not apply them to her liking. I actually do not always agree that they are needed. Yet she wants one. All the time. She wants me to wear them. Her favorite rapper is likely Nelly. But I want to make her proud. She does not care that I could suture her skin back together she wants me to perfectly align a Frozen Band-Aid on her mildly scraped knees. So I will learn. I want her to be proud. Band-Aids for all.
The Doc is In